Top 50 Money Jokes – Short Quick One-Liners

This is a compilation of funny, quick, short one liner jokes and sayings about money.

Not all of them have a deeper meaning. This collection is simply intended to bring a smile to your face or brighten up your day…

Cartoon: Zookeepers watch amazed bears working on computersSomehow they figured out how to monetize their brand.

Image: Cartoonresource (Shutterstock)

The one liners are grouped in Money Jokes taken from Life (first page), Financial One Liner Jokes (2nd page), Money One Liners related to Family and Friends (3rd page), politically incorrect but somehow funny Sexist Money Jokes (4th page), Question Answer Money Jokes (5th page) and Perils of Life Money Jokes (6th page).

Money Jokes taken from Life

Imagine, I have love letters in six different languages!
So what? I pay child support in eight different currencies.
I can handle money!
I know how to spend money,
I know how to get into debt and
I know how to lose money.
Borrow money from pessimists,
they don’t expect it back.
Living on earth may be expensive,
but it includes an annual free trip around the sun.
Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.
An oil sheik says in a gallery:
I really admire Picasso.
There is nobody who was able to sell oil so expensive.

Categories:Jokes Money Quotes

6 Responses to “Top 50 Money Jokes – Short Quick One-Liners”

  1. Para
    3 February 2013 at 4:13 am #

    Money can’t buy everything… but then again neither can no money.

  2. Ricardo
    4 February 2013 at 2:23 pm #

    Thanks for sharing these. I always love telling a joke. In fact I love telling them so much, I’m usually the one laughing the hardest.

    You can tell Monopoly is an old game – the banker can still go to jail.

  3. MoJo
    6 February 2013 at 4:52 pm #

    Poker player: “I lose way less money when I get bad cards.”

  4. TJ
    13 February 2013 at 8:15 am #

    You made me laugh with these jokes. Thank you! The last one is probably my fave 🙂

    Have a wonderful day!

  5. Warren Buffett
    16 July 2014 at 12:22 pm #

    I never laughed so hard since I invested in Enron stocks at rock-bottom prices, & still doubled my money!

  6. Dash
    26 August 2015 at 8:59 pm #

    I’m assuming this is an American set of jokes. I didn’t even raise a chuckle. Such basic humour.

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